Beer and Investing

Subject: Investment tips for 2008.

Please allow me to simplify your investment plans...

The following statements are true:

 1. If you had purchased $1000.00 of Nortel stock one year ago, it
would now be worth $49.00.

 2. With Enron, you would have $16.50 left of the original $1000.

 3. With WorldCom, you would have less than $5.00 left.

 4. If you had purchased $1000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock you would
have $49.00 left.
 
5. If you had purchased United Airlines, you would have nothing left.

But, if you had purchased $1000.00 worth of beer one year ago,
drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the aluminum recycling
refund you would have $214.00.

Based on the above, the best current investment advice is to drink
heavily and recycle. This is called the 401-Keg Plan.